San Francisco Dominatrix

No Pain, No Gain? Understanding Erotic and Non-Erotic Pain

Today I went to see my Physical Therapist for a Rotator Cuff injury rehab session. After we spent some time getting acquainted and starting the exercises, he asked me “what are your thoughts on pain?” and well, you know me, I just had to respond with, “oh, I have LOTS of thoughts on pain! First I think there’s a strong mind body connection and that pain can teach us lot about how we accept extreme sensation. I think that certain types of extreme sensation, aka pain, [notice how I started schooling the PT on my lingo?], can announce danger but also teach us how to relax around the sensation to accept the circumstance. I personally notice that as a strong self sufficient woman who starting working at the age of 14 and does not have a well resourced family or partner to fall back on, I start to feel urgency and impatience around healing as I psychologically fear I will never be able to work again, make money, or take care of myself. It’s brutal and self defeating, and yet it’s part of the process of “sitting with the pain”. I have so much more to say, oh wait, I’m sorry, is that too much?” He paused for a moment, concentrating on stretching my wrist, and then looked at me and smiled saying, “um, most people just say how they don’t like pain. Clearly you’ve thought about this”.   Read more