by Eve Minax
If you were to dig around the web or your local library, you will find a plethora of fictional and nonfictional work discussing the masochist. In fact, the term itself came from the surname of the man who wrote the original classic “Venus in Fur”, Leopold Von Sacher-Masoch (see below). Of course, like the proverbial chicken and the egg, one is not sure which came first – the sadist or the masochist. In order to give us an accessible definition of sadist and masochist we will simply say that a sadist is a person who derives erotic pleasure and or gratification out inflicting pain on others, ideally masochists. The masochist derives erotic gratification from receiving pain from the sadist. There have been many arguments over the years as to who wields the power in this dynamic, however, my concerns today are not around the power dynamic in as much as around questions of how a masochist can better develop and grow with the sadist.