Talking About Your Desires With Your Partner: How?

One of the most frequent topics I have with people is HOW to talk about their sexual desires, especially “kinky” ones with their partners. It’s never easy to whisk away the potential shame or embarrassment that can come with outing one’s bents, but it is always a way of getting to know each other better, find out more about your compatibility and what interests you. I didn’t get a chance to mention talking about fantasies here, (tip: while in bed, gently setting the scene verbally while masturbating your partner, or perhaps while discussing a book or a movie are other ways of bringing up your kinks), but I did have a great conversation with Charlotte from The Pleasure Mechanics about the value of clear communication.

I will offer more tips and techniques in a future post, but watch now to hear about why it’s important and how to go about it:

Talking About Desire

A Little Unorthodox But Then Again…

it’s me!

I’m looking for housing. Please help me find the perfect palace:)

Queer, Kinky, Service Oriented Home Search

I am exploring various options in my search for new housing, (even considering leaving SF if needed). I’ve been envisioning a Kinky, “Queerish”, Sex Positive Household in SF for over 5 years. Perhaps it’s time?

Say three or four of us who are organized, (enough), clean, (enough), enjoy an aesthetically pleasing, harmonious, inviting home with par excellence domesticity AND are undeniably kinky. Looking for a few folks who are down right sex positive and proud of it, (meaning happy with nudity, raunchy jokes, sex parties, SM and Kink) to get a larger space and make it into something special. If possible, perhaps even sustainable veggies and other food growing?

A little more about me:

I am mature, responsible, have a Chihuahua, am very friendly and enjoy people, but work and socialize enough to prefer a laid back home. I am an omnivore who cooks maybe four times a week, pretty tidy and organized. I do drink wine and enjoy having friends/lovers/submissives over, but am not a huge partier.

Since I work for myself I do not keep typical work hours, often I am on the computer or making telephone calls, sometimes I am seeing clients – not super late or super early in general. I have another studio to work from, but I would like to be able to see clients at home from time to time also.

I am told I am an excellent roomie and a clear communicator. I am conscious of your preferences, but prefer also not to have to “walk on eggshells” around tons of idiosyncrasies, and I feel you should have the same privileges with me. Honest and direct communication is key. I can afford somewhere up to $2200 depending on the circumstance (open to a place of my own also!). I am amenable to skill share to reduce rent or paying more for a larger part of the space. Ideally, I am seeking Mission, SOMA, Duboce Park, Western Addition, Castro, Bernal but am OPEN to unique opportunities (locally) that works!

Let me know if interested or if you simply have other ideas by emailing me at and tell me more about yourself and what you’ve got in mind.

Thanks for reading this:)